What am I? Chopped liver?

Wow. I just finished a super long post and hit refresh by accident and *poof*, it's gone.

Lovely.

Anyhow, I'm curious about how you all handle elementary school arts & crafts that are geared solely towards the biological parents.

I mean, I get it. I can remember making construction paper crafts with white smelly glue and big colourful markers - and I can clearly remember writing words like MOM, and DAD on the same page, even though my parents have been divorced since I was a little girl. But come on education system! Wake up! It can't be uncommon for kids to have divorced parents and I would be very suprised to learn that Jan was the only kid in her class with a step-mom.

I'm still juggling my self control on this issue. On the one hand I want her to be reassured that the divorce had nothing to do with her and that her parents are still her parents and always will be. If she wants to make something that says, "Happy Valentines Day Mom & Dad", so be it. But you'd think (or maybe I'm crazy for being so idealistic) that teachers would give the option to students to make two hearts? One for each home? Which just might encourage kids (on their own) to think about the other people who live in their home(s). Jan's biomom has a boyfriend who lives with them, and Mr.Brady has me...us "seconds" definitely do as much in the ways of raising these children, but we aren't blood related so it's not justified if we feel left out, or god forbid, complain.

I'm serious. I feel like I'm the most selfish woman on the planet when I bring this kind of thing up with women who aren't stepmoms.

I don't know. Like I said, maybe I AM being selfish - but blended families need support, even moreso from the place where our kids are spending 6 hours of their weekdays.

I know I'm generalizing. In fact, I am CERTAIN that I'm generalizing. I recently read one woman's blog where she was pleasantly suprised to find 4 chairs at the parent teacher conference. The instructor had assumed that some children would have a biomom/dad and stepmom/dad.

Now thats progressive thinking!

How do I encourage the same movement at my kids' school without sounding like a friggin' whiner.

Am I being a whiner?