The first rule of StepMom Club is - you do not talk about StepMom Club

First off, let me say THANK YOU to all you lovely ladies (and man) who commented on my last post. Words cannot express how much I appreciate it – it’s the kind of support that really makes me feel less alone, so thank you from the bottom of my heart.

Second…I’m going to give a shout out to Izzy over at stepmothersmilk.com , because it was her most recent post that inspired me to write this one. Not that this post is a mind blowing piece of literature, but it’s certainly something I need to think about.

The House Rules.

After the whole pool incident, I had a lengthy chat with Mr.Brady about the youngest one’s behavior, and how I’m not sure I can live in a house where fake crying, yelling, hitting and bad words reside. I took all of your advice, and talked to him about everything. I explained that I don’t want to come across as the evil girlfriend who won’t tolerate anything but best behavior, but I do need a balance.

And I finally admitted to myself that most of my “issues” revolve around the youngest. The older two (11 & 12) are great, they are easy to talk to and rarely ever give me reason to run and hide in a different room. The youngest is a menace. Like I mentioned in my last post, she is the baby of the family and she knows it. Not a day goes by where she isn't crying, whinning or yelling about something.

The other day, while her dad was out, I witnessed her hit her sister. I asked her to come over to me. She began to tell me why she hit her sister. I let her vent and then calmly said, “In my home, which is also your home, there is NO hitting. I will not tolerate any hitting from anyone. It is disrespectful, and a very mean thing to do. Your sister and brother do not hit you, and I expect the same from you. Do you understand?”

She stared at me, gave me a confused expression, turned and walked away. Her older sister called after her, “Walking away from someone when they’re talking to you is rude, Jan!”

I’m chopping the confused expression up to…well…just that…confusion. After all, it was the first time that I have ever pulled her aside. It was the first time that I did it, instead of letting Mr.Brady do it. It was the first time that I’ve ever put my foot down.

I let her walk away, and think about what had just happened. An hour later, she came out of the backroom and helped me make sushi.

Now the hard part seems to be enforcing rules. I don’t like idea of having to remind her of my rules right after she’s broken one of them - that doesn’t seem fair.

Here’s where Izzy comes in.

I love that Izzy has the house rules on her fridge. And the more I think about it, the more I think I need to adopt my own list. I ran the idea by Mr.Brady and he said, “Too bad Jan can’t read. But sure, post them up”.

I don’t want it to be too lengthy, or too short. So I’ll start with what’s most important to me.

We always…

Take our shoes off at the door

Put our dirty clothes in the hamper.

Rinse our dishes and put them in the dishwasher

Say please & thank you

Put away our toys when we’re finished

Knock on closed doors

We never…

Say bad words

Hit each other


Do any of you ladies have House Rules? If so, what’s on your list?